In last week’s post, The Essential Wedding Invitation Do’s and Don’t’s, we learned from wedding etiquette expert Emily Post never to include registry or gift information with the wedding invitation. But with new online registry options, popular wedding websites, and everything from honeymoon to lingerie and charity registries, the world of wedding gifts can be overwhelming. Here are some registry-specific tips and advice from Emily Post to guide you through the process!

Registry Etiquette

“Registries are incredibly organized and helpful, and it is not “greedy” to register. Most guests find registries a very efficient way to select a gift that the couple would like, would need, and that wouldn’t be duplicated by other guests. While it’s okay to have more than one registry, draw the line at three. You want to be helpful by offering your guests variety, not self-indulgent by listing your every wish in the world.

It’s fine to have a less traditional registry – one with gardening equipment or camping gear – but include a traditional one, too, even if it isn’t very full. Many guests, especially older ones, will feel much more comfortable with a few classic options. As shower gifts are typically less expensive than wedding gifts, it might be a good idea to set up a shower registry separate from your wedding registry with lower-priced items, especially if there is a shower theme.

The best registries have a mix of both prices and types of items, so that all of your guests will feel comfortable finding something they will be excited to give you.  An eager young groom once asked if it was okay for him to register for an electric razor for himself. Technically, there isn’t a “rule” against it. But there’s also a high likelihood that the razor will linger unchosen, as it’s a personal item, rather than something for the bride and groom to share in their new life together.”

Registering for Cash

“It has always been acceptable to give cash (or a check) to the bride and groom. It is also now okay for the couple to signal that gifts of money would be welcome. As with registries, give this information out by word of mouth: “Of course we would love anything you get us, but we could really use help with a down-payment on our first home.” It’s okay to say “cash,” but if that makes you uncomfortable, “donation,” “help,” or “contribution” are all good substitutes.

While there are websites that help to facilitate cash gifts, it’s best to have at least one other online registry as well, as many guests may not feel comfortable having no traditional gift options to choose from. Just remember: in the end, the choice of gift is always up to the giver, so great aunt Edna might still buy you a blender.”